Fine. I’ll be fucking grateful.

Life has felt hard lately.  I’ve been far far far out of my little Songbird Lane comfort zone, doubting myself, feeling fearful, and sinking deep deep deep into my pity party.

Everything I know about happiness and contentment (qualitative, quantitative, anecdotal and personal evidence) points to gratitude and service as major contributors to said states.

So.  (I love starting a paragraph with so.  So, deal with it) So. I have decided to do a daily gratitude blog from now until the day I move into the duplex.  Perhaps longer.

For today, I am grateful for my mind.  I’ve been reading, “Flowers for Algernon”, which is the tale of a man with an extremely low IQ who has a surgery to increase his intelligence.  The first part of the book recalls all of the cruelty this man experienced due to his limited intelligence.

I realize we should be grateful just because, and NOT because we see lack in another, but dammit, my blog my rules.  This book has made me think of how easily all academic tasks have come to me throughout my life.  My mental acuity is a blessing that has made life easier, and I am grateful.

My self talk for the past month has been, “you’re so fucking stupid.  How could you take such financial and physical risks?”  Over and over and over again.

Well guess what?  I’m not stupid.  Never have been, and hopefully, never will be.  I have been putting far too much stock into the fear and negative attitudes of others, rather than trusting in the heart, spirit and mind that has served me pretty damn well for 47 years.

So.  For today, I am grateful for my brain.  May I use it to bless my life, and the lives of those around me.

Light and Love

SMART BL

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